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Eulogy at Burial
By Jack McManus
On behalf of my brothers and sisters and our
families, thank you for attending today’s services. Your love
for our mother and support for us has helped us through a difficult
time.
I want to take a moment to share a few words on
what my mother meant to me. I found these words difficult to
write, not because of the emotion I felt about my mother and her
passing, but because the crush of day-to-day activities makes it
hard to take the time to reflect on life. So frequently, we
need to address the moment’s needs, such as a crisis at work or a
small dispute between our kids, or simply getting dinner on the
table – it's difficult to take the time to reflect on the important
events of our life. In some ways that’s a blessing because the
loss of such a wonderful person is so difficult it can be
overwhelming.
My wife Debra admired my mother tremendously and
described my Mom as being a glass-half-full kind of person who saw
the bright side of every situation. It’s true she looked for
the good in every situation and every person. But if you had
asked her, she’d say that the glass was filled to overflowing, that
she had so much that she had to give back to others, always.
She gave me gifts beyond price, but as I reflect
on her life these are the two that I treasure most. She taught
me that difficult times will eventually give way to joy. And
that serving others provides life’s greatest satisfaction.
These lessons were unspoken; taught through each act.
She faced adversity with a certainty that good
days always lie ahead. She carried a tremendous sense of
appreciation for all that she had. This was true even to her
final days. My mother’s memory had slipped to the point that
she could not remember what she’d done days, hours, or sometimes
even minutes ago. She never let her frustration prevent her from
enjoying life’s cherished moments. Even in her final days she
took pleasure in the company of family and friends. This
reflects one final triumph of her spirit over the adversities of her
life. One of many situations that she’s overcome.
Widowed twice, my mother recently shared with me
how difficult those days were for her. The loss of my father
left her with the task of raising a family of seven children ranging
from 5 to 17 years of age. She told me that her time alone in
those days was often filled with crying. Rather than
undermining her spirit, those difficult days made her appreciate
more the things she had in her life.
And in moving forward, she chose to return to
social work, where she could support her own children and help other
people in difficulty. I cannot list in our brief time together
all the ways in which she reached out to help others.
So here are the lessons I’ve taken from my Mother:
On our darkest days, joy will return, and be
felt even deeper in our hearts because we know the shadows it
drives away.
And in serving others we provide meaning to our
lives that allows us to look back on a life well-lived.
On this day, a day when we think of death and
dieing, let us also think of life and living. Let us pray
For those separated from their loved ones
By distance,
By death,
By life’s difficulties,
That they may find their way to light and joy
for all their days.
And let us give thanks
For this day together,
this moment of quiet reflection,
and for this wonderful life we’ve shared
with each other
and with my mother,
who, through her spirit and good works,
will quietly influence the lives of others for
years to come.
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